cant find the answer of what I supposed to do in the near future

It 15 mn to 10 am, I am at the Nursing school, translating for a pediatric nurse with the senior students. Today is august 17 and it almost two months that I am back to Haiti. I miss all my friends in Madison, my dear friends the Dopf's family that I will never forget and my friend in Minneapolis. I remember my plan before I came back to Haiti, everything I wanted to do, with my nursing experience, with my new experience with God. I still don’t know why, I am here, not working and not helping at all. Sometime like I always said: it hard to understand God's desire for you. I am praying God everyday to ask him. what He wants me to do?
Sometimes it makes me so sad to see how I spend my time in Haiti. Life as a Haitian is a dilemma. I will never surrender at all. The earthquake has changed many lives, also mine. I will never go back to my first life. I will never still quit in my bed in Léogâne, I will never have my cloths in my nice closet. The tent will be my home for a period of time I don’t know. Any way I am not the only victims of this living condition. Mine might be a lot better than others.
Days after days I am asking God what I supposed to do, cause I want to be active not staying as a lazy man. I want to work or create or change or promote. No one is thinking for me here In Haiti. Only God will give me the answer. I don’t know for how much I will work or where or in what condition but I just want to use my time by doing something positive.
God is giving me a passion now for Medicine; I really like the idea of being a surgeon. And that is not impossible. If it God desire its will be a lot more easy for me to apply for medical school and then become a surgeon and be more helpful for my community. I don’t know what to do or where to go or who to talk to, but I am talking with you, you who know who I am , where IO am from , and what I can do and who I was before and who I will be. God, I am talking to you now please here is my prayer:
“Like a son talking to his father I am comfortable to talk to you my God
You who know when I am sad, when I am weak and when I am lost. Please help me find the answer of what is waiting for me. I am a little afraid for myself, my future and my dream.
You have the keys of my life the keys which can open the book of success. I relay on you my father.
My prayers and my through are for you and to you. Love You God amen »

I am Back

Today I am happy that i can write something on my Blog. It's tuesday august 4th, 17 days from now will be my 2nd months back to Haiti. I have' nt up date my blog since a long time. the internet is pretty a big deal here must the time.
So I am good, have a lot to say and to do.
i am in Port au prince this week. i am working on a project with a group. we went to Cange yesterday, visiting Paul Farmer's foundation," zanmi la sante", It a great foundation. I met the medical Director, Dr. Joesil. I read the book " mountain behind mountain" so it was good to see what they are doing.
I have news about Leogane. The health care system it s not going very good. The field hospital is nt working any moree they closed it last saturday. now the Doctors without borders are the only hospital in leogane. hospital Saint Croix is working on reopen very soon.
I am working on finding a way to update my blog one time a week at least.
God is still by my side. I want you to pray for me that God can help me to find a job. i am thinking on apply for more than nursing soon. but still need to pray about it.
I am sorry that i9 am so short I will post more soon.

back to work home.

it took me a very long time to write the 1rst about my new life back in Haiti. the temperature is about 95 degrees or more. happy to be back home. Still cant figure out how to start , there so many things to do. still don't have a place to stay safe and organize. but God is planning. The street are muddy and dirty. I was sick these couple days and my girl friend also. I am having some really hard time. But I still believe that everything will be fine cause God is with me. its hard to find good internet signal and longest you stay the most you pay. I will posted more detail soon.

Ready to go back

Tonight's my last night in the states after 10 weeks externship in Madison Wisconsin. I ask you to pray for me because at this time prayer is the thing I need the most. Thank you to everyone who helped to make this trip possible for me. I don't know what is waiting for me in Haiti, and even if I don't know where I will sleep, God has a plan for me. I don't know when my next meal will be, my next shower, my next place to rest my head at night.... but Haiti is where I'm supposed to be and I'm excited to go home to my country. Good night I will write more soon and keep you up to date.

I miss the dopf

I miss the Dopf. I miss Verona............. I don't have the concentration i need to write tonight. I am also sa, very sad tonight.Cause I miss Verona. I will be back to Haiti next week. I am spending some time with my family in Cape Coral, Florida. And then going back to my country, my dear country Haiti. I miss Haiti, i miss Madison. My heart is where it should be, but not where I want to be. I should be with the people that's need my help. The People who can make me cry and Happy. It is best to forget yourself when millions of people can have a better life with your help. I AM READY TO GO BACK TO HAITI. EVEN IF I HAVE NO HOME TO SLEEP OR A BASIC BATH ROOM to use or the basics foods I need ... but "home is home and no one will make it better than us, lets DO it" God in my left, my skills in my right, nothing can stop me.
i will keep you update about the situation in Haiti. Good night.
Post more soon.

Things I cant forget about the earthquake.

Tonight I was in my room at the Dopf's House listening to Christian music and playing with the kids, we were laughing and dancing, felt very happy and good... Suddenly, I was thinking about my own nieces and nephew. I used to play with them a lot in Haiti... and later I think about Haiti and the quake. I stopped playing cause I couldn't. I felt that I was in Haiti in the earthquake was going to happen... I saw things that I never remember and talk about before tonight.It was so fast, so deep so strange, so scary that day of January 12. it was like some time when you are having a bad dream and after when you wake up you see that it's not real, it's a dream. You feel very happy that it was a dream... but "it was true" 45 seconds.. 45 little seconds. people that was by the epicenter of the earthquake in Haiti that day, like me, did not experience these 45 seconds the same way. Some cant talk now to share with us, they are not in this world, some cant walk to show us where they was... when I was in Haiti, any time I saw that house I was going to enter which is collapsed now, I ask my self why I am alive. But I do know now.
Now I remember why I was talking to the Vodoo priest that day. When he asked me to stop and wanted to try my bicycle. Mostly they don't talk very often to people. if I didn't stop, I would be inside the house and may be I would lost my life, or got damaged. But even if he stopped me, he didn't saved me. Its why God say : "I will use your enemies to rescue you"
I would like to know if he is still alive. when I will be back to Haiti next week, I would like to find him and tell him that God used him to save me. Now its is turn to be using by God to save him, not from the earthquake but hell.

I cant forget these 45 seconds. it's take 23 328 000 seconds from the fecundation to the to the last second of deliver of the the new baby. so confuse and hard for u and me to believe, right? but it's true. the same way that is true, it is also true that one life(23 328 000 seconds) was giving for millions and millions of life(infinity of seconds) The Bible says it clearly and many people had a new life because Jesus died.
Many people died from the earthquake and now all the world want to change haiti, they give a lot of money for Haiti and lot of attention, it will take time lot of energy, lot of strategy. its might be difficult or impossible to have a Haiti that everyone wish to have a day, but only the lord, our God can change Haiti.
Good night post more soon

Still learning hard, still busy. cant wait to go back to Haiti,share and use my experience from Madison and to restart the Mobile Clinics. I have met a lot of Good people here in Madison. one thing I will miss is the hospitality and the kindness of all the staff I worked with and also the very good treatment that Krista D, Dr Dopf wife gave me. I will be back in Haiti at the end of June. I still don't know where and how I will sleep. its still raining in Haiti in plus of the big aftershock that we have every 1 or two days. My desire is not to be in a good place and having a very nice life, but its to be some where I can make a change, I can create, provide, help people healing, smiling , hope and recovery they autonomy and they health. “helping people healing is providing health to my soul” God give us Life with a lot of struggles. Time to go back almost arrive no more than two weeks. when I go back to Haiti, Some things I will work on: Back to my Life in Haiti, see my Family, helping them having a better place to sleep. Restart with the Mobil Clinic Create A Nurses association i(stat in Leogane) Back to the Nursing School and setup a Fracture department in which I will be able to teach the Student: Mastering the human skeletal anatomy How to identify an open/ close fracture how to reduce it how to diagnosis and trait any compartmental syndrome how to put a cast/ splint how to remove an external fixator how to remove a cast Teach them the essential about physiotherapy for a post-op orthopedic patient Renew the CPR skills 2010 American hearth ass. Teach them how to take care of a new or old wound teach them how to take care of a patient by them self on a emergency situation Sterile technique Suture techniques ... working at the tent Hospital and help with my new Nursing skill I will be able to work as a orthopedic assistant at the Operating Room A circulant nurse or instruments Nurse working on a 24 hours opening emergency room at the hospital create a new system to manage the medical supplies and the patient records at the Hospital promote the infection control inside the Hospital Enhance the sterile technique at the OR helping with a electronic system for the pharmacy and a better maintenance for the Drugs and fluid. create a PT(physical therapy department at the Hospital for the Post-op patient) ... participate to my Graduation ceremony in December take the national exam for nurses in Haiti Getting more Education to provide a better care in Haiti. Staff I need and

things I still don't have to go back to Haiti:
I need a complete nursing kit DUAL HEAD PROFESSIONAL NURSING STETHOSCOPE
Mini Otoscope/Ophthalmoscope Kit Pocket Resuscitator Mask
AED (automated external defibrillator) for trainer (training the nurses and the student) real AED for the hospital
We need an x-ray Machine at the tent Hospital
We need to have laboratory access
I need support with the Mobile Clinique
Camping rechargeable lantern Coleman
Inflate-All Quick Pump many other suplies
...
post more soon

hope for haiti

Today, May 12, 2010; 4 months after the quake killed about 300 000 kids and adults, left thousands of new amputees and many injured and destroyed houses, schools and others public and private offices in Haiti. Many things have been changed since that Tuesday, January 12, 2010.
Many poeple were planning to do something on Wednesday, January 13. Like a birthday celebration or a trip to another country or a having a wedding or a graduation ceremony anything we can imagine.
I remember Angela and I was talking at the Library of the nursing school around 4 pm at FSIL, the nursing School. She was talking about her life, her daughter. Angela was a smart student at the nursing school we spent 4 years together she was fighting to get a license in Nursing and try to get a good job to make the education of her 2 years old daughter and to help her family. She has one younger sister who is a nurse student too at the national nursing school in Port-au-Prince.





She was one of these Haitian like me too that believe in education and also that being educate is the key of success.
In Haiti, most of the parents have not been to an elementary school. They think that it’s a crime and they make a lot of sacrifice to educate their children as they can. Some of the sells water in the streets, or sell bread or sugar or make a little activity where they. That was not the case for Angela because her mother was sick and I don’t know may be she had a scholarship because she was really smart. Angela was pregnant for her boyfriend, so she got married with him. Pregnancy, nursing school and live as an Haitian was a big struggle for her but she sacrificed herself completely and success for her future, her family and her country. But… she was killed by the quake and her Sister perishes with the other 200 students at her school. They were taking an exam in Port-au-prince. It’s hard to say and to believe but that was the surprise of the quake.
Who know when something like the earthquake will surprise him too?
Sometime we forget who we are, where we are from and what we are made of.
We are NOTHING!!!
Angela is a perfect example. 22 years old, smart, young and beautiful. With Lot of energy, she had a dream, a goal and a vision like we do too.
Who want to be like Angela? And who can avoid that thing that happened to Angela?
Sometime we need to recognize that “we don’t own life and we have to live everyday as a gift. A day life, dream and goal will disappear. But love that we share with others will never died “. Love’s manifestations are multiple; Jesus shared his love with us by giving his life in the cross. This is the biggest proof of love that we know since the world is world.
Haiti needs Love, especially at this time thousands of people need food, safe water, health, electricity, job, education, infrastructures…this list is long, and it means a lot in time and money. But they are the basic things that a country need. Our politician doesn’t have a good mechanism of action to enhance these systems. They tried but don’t success. We need education for the young, and a good condition of life that will give them the opportunity to stay in Haiti and rebuilt the country. There is a lot to do. The task is hard, but if we want and believe, we could.

Many things have been changed since the earthquake of January 12. Many people heard since a long time about Haiti, but never had a chance to visit. Once they have this desire to go and help after the quake hit in Haiti, they fall in love for Haiti, and also they have a new vision about life. They think more about helping, giving, loving, caring…and less about money, power. Race...
Many people left them family behind them go to Haiti and help. What they saw in Haiti. Make a change in their life. By sharing that with other people, they give more hope for Haiti.
May 18, will be a national celebration in Haiti. Its remind the 207 th anniversary of the Haitian flag.
Thank you all of you, for your prayer and support for me and Haiti.

Good night! Post more soon
lrigan@yahoo.fr

Peace to my Grand mother

Tonight I want to post a quick update. Last night my sister Alcie, email me and tell me that my Grand mother was died, I was sad and think about her when I was leaving her in Haiti, she was old and was burned by a kerosene lamp one week before she died. right after they brought her to a tent hospital in Leogane, 67 % of her body was burned... poor grand ma. she was in coma right after her burn. now she is in peace and I hope that she goes straight to the haven.

I am still doing progress on my externship at Meriter Hospital. My suture skills are great and I learn a lot about orthopedic instruments, cast, splinting and sterile technic. I also spent time on foot and ankle care. These new experiences or knowledge will be more than helpfull for me in haiti. words are not enough to thank Dr.Dopf and meriter Hospital for this opportunity they give me and the sacrifices they are making to help Haiti. Hope next week I could start to work with some physician at University of Wisconsin Hospital.




I still thank God because he shows me his way and tells me what he wants me to do and opening all door for me and giving me a lot of opportunities and put a lot of good poeple in my way. At this time I would never think I would be here In Madison, but God was planning and wrote some where in his book that I should be here , and his words are true I am here. I didn't choose Him he did. But when He called me, I said yes. Since, He is using me showing me that there is nothing in this earth that can compare to his love, his power and what he save for us in the haven. I am surprise about what I am seeing here in the states and also think about what kind of life I was living in Haiti, some time I ask my self: " why God choose this time right after the earthquake in Haiti, where life is so difficult at this present moment to bring me in the states?" why, why? I dont know. when I went to the nursing school right after the earthquake and help the people. I didn't know who I was; I leave my house and never come back, leave my bed room with all my supplies, leave my family and spent tree weeks without seeing them. my house is at about 10 mns from the nursing School. It was not me but God, because when God is in you, you forget all that you have, and who you are. and the more you care about materiel, the less you are close to God. ist why He said that It's very difficult for a rich man to go to the haven.

The Nursing school is open now. And the task become more difficult for the student and the Dean of the Nursing School cause we had a few people that really have a good qualification to teach in Haiti. the earthquake killed many of them.I cant wait to go back and share my experience with them. Now WE need support all kind of support. education, infrastructure, health, development... we need to restart. I cant change haiti by my self but I believe that God can and will. Next week I will be very busy with my new schedule. God give me a passion and energy to learn. Now I am asking Him to help me to get a master in nursing, Or help me to become a Surgeon. because I want to learn more and be more help full for Haiti, We have a few among of doctors and most of them are not really qualified because all they objectives are making money and have a cute life. God Give me a passion for Haiti.
I am lucky and very gracefull to be a Christian and a health provider at the same time, it's like a blessing.
Haiti for god God for Haiti
it' almost 1: 44 Am I need to get some rest. will post more soon
Love you all!

My trip to Madison Wisconsin

I am finally enter the USA, after a lot of effort that Dr. Dopf A. Craig one of the first orthopedic doctor I work with In Haiti right after the earthquake, made to get me here. with the help of many other people and institution like the UWHC, where I will get my training. My trip to Madison is a blessing. I will be able to get some more experience in nursing and be more help full for my community in Haiti. We still need help and specially health care. Tonight I will be short cause it's late. but I wanted to share this experience and keep this blog up date then people will still know what I am doing and how thing is doing in haiti. even I am not in Haiti, but I still have connection with my family and some friends in haiti. Today I was talking with my mom and I was very sad for them and for Haiti. I was thinking about them and it makes me cry a lot and it's one of the reason that I up date my blog tonight cause I really want to write to decrease my sadness. actually it's 11: 30 p.m. I am sitting in front of my computer and crying. cause I feel that my place is not here. it's true that I am here for a good reason and I am very comfortable with the Dopf's family where I am living now for the 70 days of training at the UWHC(University of Wisconsin Hospital and Clinic. I feel that they was my own family. They give me everything I need or want. they are very nice with me and feel very comfortable with them. I am very happy to see Dr. Dopf again, get to know him more and spend time with his beautifull family. they are wonder full, Craig and his wife Christa and God will bless them. this link will tell you more about who he is and how I met him and my first day in Madison.


http://www.wkowtv.com/global/video/flash/popupplayer.asp?clipId1=4688362&flvUri=&partnerclipid=&at1=News&vt1=v&h1=Hospitality%20for%20Haiti&d1=162300&redirUrl=&activePane=info&LaunchPageAdTag=homepage&clipFormat=flv&rnd=17200572


I call Haiti today, cause I wanted to finish working on documents before I call them. it was for the first time since I am here in Madison, I arrived here on april 9. I was so happy to talk with my mom. but was also sad because of what she told me about home and Haiti.
Last night was terrible for them, it was raining so much that the tent where my family is living now collapsed into them . the sadness thing is that one of my brother just have two little girls(twins )they have about one month. my nieces, the twins was sleeping inside the tent. Imagine what happened when it collapsed. So my brother was obliged to cover the twins, his daughters with his own body. So that story about my family, and I know that it's not only my family that knows that situation but thousands and thousands of others family. So I just felt abnormal for me to be here at this time. every single things I put in my mouth hurt me heart cause it think about these people in Haiti. and one more thing that make live more difficult is that they still have big aftershock yesterday and this morning they had two big and the people was very scared. I need to go now and i will keep you up date. tomorrow would be my first day at the Hospital. Last week I made all my screening and was will concern about my results cause I spent 3 months in haiti After the earthquake working very hard with the patients and was exposed to all kind of germs and pathologies, blood...So I am fine all my result are normal. So this week will be very busy for me , will start with my training and get immunizations and...
will post more soon.

Getting rest in Domonican Rep.

After a long period of hard work, I found a brake time to go to D R. getting some rest. It's took me a long time to update my blog. I feel more healthy now and I look more clean. but I cant imagine me sleeping inside a house. Some time , I feel like the house is moving with me . But it just imagination. I am fine, I thank may be if I find one house in haiti to sleep I might take my chance.
Some friend help me very hardly to access the D.R. I Thank Dr. Craig and his wife for they support inestimable and also Dr. Preston and Wife. and Yvenel Verger, a Haitian friend in Dominican Rep. who took good care of me. I cant imagine what I would do in Dominican Rep. without the help of Yvenel. I speak spanish, a litle bit(un pokito) my litle english helps me somtime too,there is a few poeple that speak english in the capital where I was, in Santo Domingo,DR
The panic about erthquake is also know in Dominican Rep. last week one 4.5 magnetude earthquake happen in santiago, Dominican Rep. not to big but ...
post moe soon
...

I miss my mom!

No news for today.
i am still ok. today i worked as a Pharmacist. and I love what I am doing. and I thank God for is protection.
Thank you for your prayers.
I miss my familly, my mom specially. for the sacrifices she did for me. to taking care of me since I was born and to give me a good education and a christian education, the most important. Gislaine, "my dear mom I love you so much". thye last time i we had a conversation, she told me: "Rigan please keep going to church" sometime I also miss My Dad, Numa "bon gason" also.He left since 2006. He gave birth to a lot of beautifull kids. at this time most of them live far from where i am . I would like at this time to be with them but these poeple need me more than I need to see them. my family is large, I have many sisters and brothers,nieces and Nephew and cousins. the thing is that many of us are nurses. I cant count, we are about 15 nurses or more in my familly.
I want to tell all of them that: "I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH"
the night is quite, very differente from last night. last night was a scared one, lot of wine and many aftershock. it was the first day I was afraid after the earthquake.
My heart bit very fast and I could nt sleep.
I dont know when things will become like before.
I wish I could sleep well tonight in my bed room that I loved so much with my fan. and My roof, wich shows me the nice view of the night and the stars in the sky. The rain is stopping for this moment, God listened to our prayers.
Bless the Lord.
post more soon

It’s took me a long time to post more. Because the work I am doing at the nursing school keeps me busy.



I wanted to start this short update by thanking all my friends and brothers in God and all team that had supported us after the earthquake. Your prayers, your presence with us were a symbol of “love”. I don’t want to list cause I may forget, but since the first day after the earthquake until now, there are some names I can’t forget: Ms Michel, who helps us since the first day after the earthquake. She is an amazing nurse. "Under the sun, in the ground, between these populations of black people, it's easy to distinguish, this only white lady, taking care, with an inestimable energy and passion of the poor Haitians; it was Michel. A nurse who came from Montana in Haiti that day to teach the student at the nursing school" she belongs to a nursing foundation: “Nurses for nurses”. One day I was working with the patients when one helicopter comes down at the nursing school. It was a US marines helicopter, inside was: My sister Alcie, a register nurse who live in the states; leaving her husband, kids and work, to come down in Haiti, her own country to help her people. After I saw Tim Bristol my friend and brother in Christ, who supports me a lot, He has a PHD in Nursing and Education. He plans the trip and brings with him my sister, Alcie; a nurse student, my girl friend, Lisa Richards, she is an amazing girl, and I am proud of her and also lucky to have her by my side. We have a big plan for Haiti; and my friend, the brave man, Dr. Craig, an orthopedist; He was the first orthopedic doctor we had working with us, I was happy to work by his side. He is very organized and works with professionalism. And I work with many doctors and Nurses and non medic people. We loved and love what our work. I can’t make the list of all of them:



* Doctors, Nurses and others,
o Michele S., RN
o Tim B, PHD, nursing
o Craig D. MD, Ortho.
o Dean, V., RN
o Alcie J., RN
o Lisa R. RN'S
o Marc, MD.
o Jim, MD.
o Chain, Medic
o Deb, MD
o Christ B. MD.
o Craig H.,MD.
o Lori S., RN.
o Tom F., RN
o Carolyn, Log
o Christ MD
o Sean, Notre Dame
o Chris B. , MD
o Tamy, 3RN
o Mr.& Ms. Fenelon, RN both
o Preston MD, Urologist
o Dan S., Economy
o John, Past
o Jodel
o Sue
o Churc, MD
o M. Echhorn, RN.
o Jhon G, Emergency M.
o Amy W. EM.
o Josh W.EM.
o Dan W., EM.
o Nahan H.
o Chrirt B., EM.
o Dona, RN.
o Emmy B.,RN
o Serge D., RN.
o Stephanie M., RN
o Dean V., RN.
o Brian, RN.
o Sheryl, RN.
o Carol G., RN.
o Rocco, MD, Plast.
o Kelly, ER, Nurse.
o Neuman, Anhest.
o Cindy B., Anhest.
o Towle D., Anhest.
o Power C., Anhest.
o Waterrer R, Anhest.
o Cross P., Anhest.
o Jeff W., Anhest.
o Jhon G., Anhest.
o Bob Y., Anhest.
o Bruce K., Anhest.
o Brett H. MD., Ped.
o Christ Mc. C., MD, OBGYN
o Anne M. B., MD. , OBGYN.
o John G.,ICU.
o Beth, Pharm.
o Christ B., Pharm
o Nate H.,Pharm.
o Lisa, Pharm.
o Shean C., Medic
o Brett M., Medic
o Matt, Medic
o Bill J., Medic
o Mehrdad, Medic
o Tyler, Medic.
o
* Japanese team
o Hatanaca, MD
o Otomo,; JCA team,
o Sachiko, RJ
o Satima, RN
o Capt. Miura,Jp. Military
* MARINES
o Cap. Rebecca
o Capt. Jay
o Major Wills C.
o Pierre L.
o Pascal
o Howard
o Tim
o ...



* The MSF (Doctor without Borders)
* the save the Children
* many others…



And lot of other people That I love so much, But I don’t have time memorized them name but not forget them. Because they are living in my heart, and some time it's give me a very sad feeling to think about all of them.

If they are ready these lines. Please know that I can’t forget all of you for precious work you did in Haiti after the earth of the January 12 2010. God will be with you and will use people to help you in your life like He used you at this time to help other peoples.

I always thank God for that blessing. It's the biggest girf that I could find by being using by the lord, our lord.

Today, like many other days, I was going on mobile with a team, they wanted to know what the mobile looks like. We went to a place called “Brach" 20 mns from the main city of Léogâne by car. We saw about 90 people. It’s Sunday, I planned this mobile with one pastor from the area. Fleury orphanage’s pastor. The people went to church in the morning and stay after waiting for the clinic.

The health condition is a little better now in Haiti. But we still have to work one the system of maintenance; I mean how can we keep the people more healthy in Haiti? We need to work on sanitation, infrastructure and Education. It’s something that we can do.

Today the most cases we found were many patients with H-Pillory and Vaginal infection. About 65% of the population asked drugs for these illnesses. We also dress some wounds and drained some abscesses. The day was fine. We went home by 5 am. Tomorrow we are planning a big M. clinic. We are going to St. Etienne, 13 kilometers up to the mountains in jacmel’s road. We may have several doctors, nurses, nurse students and a nurse practitioner. Dr. Emilie, one of the doctor we have, left Haiti, a week ago after the earthquake, just come back today ad will be excited to go with us.

Other News, now it’s raining and last night, a couple nights before tonight, it was raining a lot and the water came in my tent. I was obliged to leave my tent and go outside in the rain to put a tarp into it, and I fell asleep vey late. I was not the only on that lived that situation at the Nursing School or in Léogâne.

The rain season is really close. We need to figure out what to do.

With the rain, we will have:

* water in the tent
* Water in the road
* Mud in the streets
* proliferation of mosquitoes

= fever (Dengue- Malaria- Filariasis ...)

And more others problems and illness...



I think and also know that God will do something.



We are still living at Hilda’s property at the nursing school and she is still taking good care of us. I am not sure about the future, what I know is that we need to pray for Haiti.

Hope I could post more soon

my story

I want to share my experience during these last weeks in Haiti. No one would like to life these experiences cause it too hard.


My experiences during the earthquake en Haiti help me
Learning a lot about life, fortune and God
And also I could find the answer about two important subjects:
1- I understand why God wanted me to become a nurse as a Christian.
2- And why He save me that day (January 12, 2010)
My dream and God’s desire
Since I was born I was a Christian, early in school I had a goal for my life, I wanted to become an engineer. But it was not God’s plan for me. After school I had all the possibility to be admitted to a public engineer school because I am very good on math, physics and chemist, it’s all that you need to pass the exam. For a reason I couldn’t know, they asked me to go to a nursing school. I did agree with them after one year and then I went to the nursing School. I fins I was at the nursing school, I finish my program of nursing well. But since all the years I was at the N. School, I keep thinking about why I went there? I couldn’t find the answer, sometime I am made with myself, like when I meet my friends from High school whose engineer or doctor or agronomist…
“I was fighting against God desire, because sometime it’s really hard to know what God wants you to do and you stay where you want but not where God wants or where you supposed to be, that was my struggle for a long time”
One hour before the earthquake
One day, January 12, the darkness day, I was at the nursing School since 1:00 pm, until 4:00 pm I was working at the library on something that I wanted to prepare for Hilda to share with the Senior at the nursing school on Monday, and also I was talking with one of the graduate nurse from the Nursing school who died on that day in the street, in Léogâne (Angela). After a long research I felt that I was tired and most the time I am tired after a long day of work or homework, I always go to play soccer. It’s exactly what I did that day; I left the nursing school (FSIL), I go to my house to get my staff to play soccer. I take my bicycle and then I ride myself to the soccer field. Normally it’s took me less than10 mns to go to the soccer field on motorcycle, it’s was not common to go on bicycle, it a too long way cause Haitian like taking motorcycle, but that day I wanted to ride my funny bike without knowing why. It was about 4: 45 pm, I was riding my bike In a road that I don’t make all the time and where I could see a lot of “voodoo” temple (place where voodoo’s priest makes their ritual) And all of a sudden, one of the priest called me and asked me to let him try my bicycle. With no fear, no question I give him the bike and I watching him riding my bike, after he came and asked my name;
“It’s strange, why I left FSIL at 4:00 with the destination to go to play soccer, soccer field? Why I took my bike but not a motorcycle,( take more time)? Why this voodoo’s priest wanted to stop me in my way to try my bike?”
He asked me about my faith in God, I tell him about the bible, and I asked him the signification of the pictures I saw in the wall of his temple; it’s took me about 10 mns to continue my way to the soccer field, I go faster this time because it was late and I wanted to play. 4 mns later I could see the soccer field; I was close, talking with a friend in front of his house, where I always go to change before playing.
The earthquake,
I was going to enter in my friend house to change when one old woman said in Creole: “kouran mezanmi kouri!!!” that’s mean in English: “everybody get out of here electricity” I do the best to run to leave my position, but it was very difficult cause it was like something wanted to push me away and another to hold me. Two seconds later I could see the house collapsed and the heart was opening I could feel the earth shaking intensely and I heard people crying loudly from fear or from injuries…I was in the road by the soccer field, I lived this situation for 45 seconds.
I couldn’t understand what was happening. First I thought about the end of the days. Then I say to the lord: If it is the end and I am still alive that’s I have a chance to be in the heaven. It’ true that I didn’t have any fear. Two mns after the earthquake, one 7.3, I was at the soccer field. I was the first there; the after chocks came immediately after the first minute. A few minute later I saw some people coming at the soccer field; crying, dirty some safe and some with big injuries. I was the only one that was clean between them. One of them, a Christian, was talking about the revelation from the Bible, the apocalypse.
First patient, fears and first prayer after the earthquake
I had a little fear when I saw the water coming out side of the wells and from the earth. Because one month I saw a movie which describes everything that I saw that day, it was: 2012 The Doom’s day. I thought about an eventual tsunami and also that the earthquake was general, over the world. I took my phone trying to call home and I found no signal from my network, I was very afraid for them, my family. I remember I left my cousins, my brother’s wife, my brothers and some friend watching TV inside the house. My brother’s wife, one of my brothers is pregnant and she lives at the first floor at home. I also thought about my family in the states and also my fiancé and her family.
It was serious, in like 5 mns I could see about 100 people at the field. Some standing with little cut some lying with real injuries and some with no trauma but dirty. I asked them to sit in the middle of the field to avoid the trees from the corner of the soccer field. The first people I touch were a girl, about 17 years old she was bleeding from her head and her members. I make some pressure to stop the bleeding and adopt some appropriate position and clean the wounds as possible I could and I told them what happened. A lot of people needed care; kids, adults old… it was the first time that my eyes could see something like that and each minute it’s become worst. My first prayer was:
“Dear God, I know that if I am alive it’s not because I am lucky but because you want me to leave, like you wanted me to become a nurse, because these people need me as a nurse and as a Christian. Thank you for protecting me and using me to save some of brothers and sisters. Forgive me for my sins, Give me faith and strength. Thank you for the Cross.
Amen.
After that prayer I had no fears and I wanted to go in the street and go home to see my family, after stabilized the most I could the patients in that village I was, I went with a couple the mom was crying at the ground and the dad took his 18 month daughter under a big brick from his house which collapsed into the kid who was sleeping inside. I could see that she was died. Check the jugular pulse and the respiration…nothing… she died. It was sad, it was my first death and about 40 others were waiting for at the nursing school that became a Hospital and a tents city now. I made CPR for her and we took a motorcycle me and the dad and we drive to the town to find an hospital cause it’s true that I know she was died but sometime…we are still on the Moto and I keep giving her some cardiac massage. Then I could see houses collapsed and people sitting by the road side asking for care, I didn’t have any supplies with me; no gloves, no bandage…nothing. It was terrified. I wanted to cry but God gave me strength and I was very strong. Behind the father I sat, carry the death and when we arrived to the hospital, the building was also collapsed with all the medical team inside, that was unimaginable. Everything gone, school, public like private; churches; public offices; houses; police station… I was very strong that day because I was not alone. Sudden I remember my family. I put the baby in the ground; I remove my shirt and cover the body. And ask the father to be strong. And then I walked to my house. Sometime, in the road, I close my eyes because I couldn’t watch that I saw. I was walking in the city and I couldn’t recognize any area because everything disappeared. Some building still had people alive inside and other people tried to put them out. Me I was very concern about my house and my family. What happen to them?
How God bless my family
I was asking to myself how I will live the next 5 mns where I will be at home. The streets were close because of the fragments of the collapsed building. And it’s took me a while to be behind my house. And by where I was, I could see the top of my house, which means that it ‘still stands. I was smiling a little bit. Then I arrived to my house, I saw one of my brothers that were watching TV, he was safe. I embrace him and we cried together. After I asked him how everybody is. And he said that they are well. I ask him if no one has a any injuries. He said that everything was fine.
My mission (from God), the nursing school
And I told him everything I saw in my way. And then I tell him that I have to go to the nursing school to see what happen to the student and the Dean of the school. When I arrived to the nursing school, the first people I saw were Hilda, the Dean of the school. She embraced me and we were crying together. And immediately after, I was watching the campus. Hundreds of people were coming from the entire city asking for care.ith all kind of injuries. It was sad, because before the earthquake we didn’t have any real hospital, then it makes the situation worst. We are a nursing school, it true that we might help but we need supplies. So any way, God knew what we needed and He provided us some supplies and the strength we needed to do the best we could for these people. Since 6:30 pm we took care of patients the day of the earthquake until 2: am. It was a long night. We put some sheet in the ground of the school and tried to fall asleep, but it was impossible because the aftershock made us scared…
First day after the event
The sick people sleep in the ground with their families. The day after was so sad. Many people cried because some patients died after they slept. Some people died from head trauma, internal bleeding or other problems. Early in the morning we go for a visit, me and a nurse from the states t
The lesson I learned with the earth quake

I want to talk about three things concerning the earthquake I lived in Haiti. Fortune, life and God. Which is the most important things I needed to have in my life? If I asked one population of people that question, I would have a lot of answer; some people would say that the like they life, they don’t want to die or they don’t want to lose the nice car they just bought and some will not negotiate their faith in God and would gave everything only to serve God.
That day, I knew these three dimensions;
After the big shaking, remember I was on bicycle before the earthquake happened, I wanted to ask one kid who close to me to get my bike for me cause I thought that they could steal it. I didn’t know why I thought about that, but it was the fortune time. It’s why a lot of people die; after the earthquake they go inside the house to get staff and the big aftershocks finished the house and killed them, so sad. Some other tried to open some office to steal money or supplies and they disappeared with the building. A lot of people died because they wanted to get Rich that day or to save their fortune or for some other reason…
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